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Nandita Kochar

One, if given a choice, would any day prefer a date with a stranger over a presentation or holding hands with his/her lover at the movies over a board of members meeting. We all know and admire the highs and ecstasy of love and we all detest the dullness and tedious nature of our work. 

And yet, there are a number of reasons why sometimes work wins over love. 

Reason 1: Professionalism

Let’s just say that your partner ordered a crab salad when you’d specifically asked them not to because you just cannot stand neither the smell nor the sight of it. You have all the liberty to scream, shout or even walk out on them. Now suppose if instead of your partner, it was your boss or colleague who did so. What would you do? Remain professional and act in a calm and stoic manner. 

Such an atmosphere where we are not allowed to explode or be our authentic self all the time is sometimes a big relief from an atmosphere where people are too crass or honest in the name of being themselves.

Reason 2: Training

When you join in for a brand new job, you are taken for a tour of the office, given proper handouts and trained for a good couple of months before your supervisor feels confident enough about setting you free on your own. 

But when you decide to fall in love, it’s like a freefall. There’s no harness or training or someone waiting at the other end to catch you. You are pretty much on your own. And that can be scary at times!

Reason 3: Feedback

If your boss were to sit with you, on a Friday afternoon, and give you feedback on your presentation, one thing you’d be assured about is that this feedback will not be covered in sugar. It’ll be honest and to the point. 

But can you say the same about your lover? Who might think ten times before letting you know directly as to what it is that irritates her about your eating habits or your dressing style. Instead of sitting you down and explaining her feelings to you, she might resort to slamming doors or breaking dishes. And how healthy is that?

Also, one of the core aspects of love is that you should be accepted for who you are and not be changed. And that right there does not leave much room for feedback, does it?

 

No wonder we are often more happy when we can leave our homes for work the next morning!

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