Confronting difficult situations every now and then?

Not an unusual scenario!

All of us face such situations day in and day out…

…There is no guaranteed formula to follow to overcome such difficult situations but you can ease the pain by working on your attitude as per your aptitude.

“It is only in our darkest hours that we may discover the true strength of the brilliant light within ourselves that can never, ever, be dimmed.” – Doe Zantamata

Here you need to be realistic, to assess whether the situation is really difficult or you are perceiving it to be difficult.

The most difficult situation is adjusting to the change. Every change is taxing as it shakes your comfort zone and you don’t like it. Though you have worked for the change, the process is painful, which you need to appreciate.

Every change takes time; appreciate the small steps of improvement. During the change, stay calm, stay friendly and work up to the more difficult situations, just in case these arrive. Focus on remaining positive and optimistic.

Understand, it is easier said than done. You are facing conflicts from all corners – Inside / Outside.

Few tips to overcome such situations:

  • Use conflict as a natural resource
  • Don’t react
  • Deal with feelings
  • Attack the problem, not the person
  • Practice direct communication
  • Look past positions to the underlying interests
  • Focus on the future

Life is like a rainbow, a vibgyor, a mixture of happy moments, mundane normality, and difficult situations. While all of us cherish plenty of happy moments and it is easy to fall into a routine, it is the difficult situations that test your mettle. Difficulties will occur throughout your life, at different stages and ages. In each case, you will need to draw on a reserve from within to help you tackle the difficult situation and come through the other side stronger and wiser.

“We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

One of the biggest positives of difficult situations is that your character is formed or revealed most during tough times. If you weren’t tested, you did never know the full strength of your abilities and coping skills and you did never be aware of just how much inner strength you contain.

To optimize your potential there is a need to realize that part of what you’re going through is about reshaping yourself. This will include your need to assess what needs to change that is not working for you. If you can change that it can ultimately lead to a stronger and more resilient you.

Sometimes the difficult situation comes about as a result of your “calling”, be it faith, career, parenthood, research, or whatever. In such a case, remember why you chose this path and take strength from remembering why it matters to you.

Many times, we see that situations are very obviously difficult like the loss of a near one, failure, relationship going kaput, missed opportunity, etc. But many times, these are not so obvious, we get disturbed by small aberrations in life and overreact to them. Thus, making the situation all the more difficult.

The tips to face such situations may be:

  • Acknowledge your feelings and feel the pain
  • Talk about it
  • Try to see past the crisis in your life
  • Take care of yourself
  • Consider the severity of your issue
  • Accept what you cannot change
  • Get help
  • Seek out those people who will support you

Acceptance that the situation is difficult and patience to handle it should be the guiding mantra. You need to control what you can but accept that there is much which cannot be controlled. You have control over how you react and how you choose to act.

But if the difficult situation is difficult because of others in your life, then you have a lot less control over what others around you choose to do. You even have lesser control over the circumstances surrounding you. In such a situation, you are bound to feel helpless and you are surrounded by thoughts that you cannot control what others do or say that affect you. But you do have control over how you respond.

The choice lies with you. But the question is whether you’re willing to make choices that benefit you and increase your strength to cope with the difficulties you’re facing or keep on brooding about it.

“Learn how to be happy with what you have while you pursue all that you want.” – Jim Rohn

Spread Happiness, Think Positive and HappyHo