Imagine if one morning you woke up with excruciating pain in your right knee; so unbearable that you were unable to move off your bed. Your first thought would be to immediately visit a doctor along with someone. No resistance.
Imagine if one morning you woke up with immense sadness in your heart; so unbearable that you were unable to move off your bed. Your first thought would be, “I cannot be sad. How can I be sad? Who likes to be this way? Definitely not me!” You try to bury the “negative” emotion deep within. Complete resistance.
What if we told you that just like you could trust your physical self’s innate intelligence (its ability to warn you against something undesired & reward for something nourishing), similarly you could trust the less-talked-about innate intelligence of your emotional self? Would you then try to listen to your emotions with more sensitivity, especially to the “negative” ones?
“Negative” emotions are not something you need to avoid or fight. Think of them as a power you’ve been blessed with, a power that lets you detect a possible problem in your life and guides you towards healing.
“How do I harness a power, about which I learned just two secs back?”, you might ask. Here are a few pointers that might be of help –
- Listen to your “negative” emotion
Everytime you feel an unpleasant emotion rise up to the surface, no matter how big or small, make space for it to express itself. You can write it down or talk to yourself about how the emotion makes you feel. Focus all your energy on the currently activated emotion. Let it speak. You listen.
Ask questions to your “negative” emotion
As soon as the emotion has expressed itself in its entirety, ask it solution-oriented questions. You’ll be surprised by how helpful & well-suited the answers will be. Be patient while implementing this step.
Practice gratitude for these emotions
Each time anger, jealousy, hatred or any other uncomfortable emotion reaches your heart, try feeling a sense of gratitude about its arrival. This might take some time to happen. That’s perfectly alright! Be thankful for the valuable lesson this emotion will eventually teach you, instead of trying to resist or waging a war against it.
Stay committed to yourself
Understand that the best version of you is not someone who stays happy all the time. Rather someone who welcomes each emotion with open arms & understands that she is as much of a treasured human when she is sad as when she is happy.
True emotional healing isn’t about fighting or resisting. It involves a more intuitive, vulnerable and compassionate approach. It involves lending an ear to your “negative” emotions, thinking of them as on your side, not against.
So, the next time you wake up with a heart filled with sadness, we are sure you’ll know what to do! Listen.